Interview Reflections

INTERVIEW REFLECTIONS

The thought of an autobiographical video elicited an automatic response in me, one that I now realize I was allowing to define me. During the process of producing the script and storymap for the video, I changed my story. I mean I have REALLY changed my story, and I have changed it forever.

My story had been the same for years — ever since my father died. “My brother was a lazy jerk. I did all the work, and I got nothing for it.”

This project, as predicted, was transformative. It helped me redefine my relationship with my father as being beautiful, warm and special as it truly was. I had allowed the resentment of my father leaving his entire estate to my brother, to almost destroyed it. This project brought the wonder of it back.

The characterization of my brother also made me think his sabotage had started long before in trying to destroy my relationship with my father. I’ll never know, and it doesn’t matter, because this project made me realize that I alone had allowed that to happen. My father was truly a product of his times, a typical patriarchal society.

I have never liked my story. I have never liked telling it – it brought everyone down. It always spawned much anger from my feminist friends. “It’s not right, it’s not fair – it’s so patriarchal.” My audience for this story has usually been my women’s rights crusader friends. I don’t know who will be my audience now. I see many postings listed with mine on the YouTube channel that are telling stories about equal rights, and farm family brothers and sisters being treated equally — so maybe there has been progress.

The realization that I had truly been the gifted one was a breakthrough for me. I am truly the one who benefitted the most — I received the greatest gift of all from my father. Need I say, this has been a very positive experience for me, for now, I have a new story! I hope to help others also be able to turn their stories into positive learning experiences.

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